'My best friends are the ones I made as an adult. Here's how I did it.'

For the greater good of this article, I'm going to be honest and slightly egotistical: I'm really good at making friends. 

I didn't know I was good at making friends until the friends I had made would ask me, "How do you have so many close friends?" 

I wouldn't call myself a "great" friend, although I'd like to think that I am. If anything, I'm mediocre at best. There aren't lines of people waiting outside my apartment hoping to interview for a friendship role. 

The main reason for my long-lasting and loyal friendships is complete mutual interest in each other. 

Watch: To dogs, our best friends. Post continues below.

I have full interest in every aspect of my friends' lives and they have the same level of interest in mine. 

When the balance is off, for example, if your friends only care about your work or only care about your love life, either the friendship ends or you both get demoted to acquaintances. 

You might argue that you have different friends for different things, but from personal experience, those friendships haven't lasted or they're not people that I'd be completely destroyed if I were to never see them again.

I've noticed that depending on lifestyle and priorities, achieving complete mutual interest can vary in difficulty.

People in romantic relationships might struggle more to make friends as individuals because their partner takes up a lot of their mental capacity when it comes to prioritising a person. Similar to someone who has dependents, those people might also find it difficult to maintain friendships. 

It is, however, the friendships you can sustain throughout these life phases that will be the most loving and bring you the most joy.

As someone who has made her closest, long-lasting friendships as an adult, I can confidently say that there are five tried and tested friendship-finding avenues that I recommend to everyone. 

Here's how I did it.

Work.

I've been lucky enough to have made my closest friendships through work. 

Workplace friendships are usually situational friendships that get dropped when someone changes their job. One of the best ways to keep a workplace friendship from ending is through my favourite daytime activity... Gossiping. 

Sure, your work friends might be onto bigger and better things, but I bet they will devour any bit of gossip you have for them over some drinks. 

Sarcasm aside, bonding with someone at work can lead to a strong friendship in the future regardless of where the two of you end up. If you really vibe with someone, send them a message and ask them to hang out, it'll be like no time has passed. 

Online. 

Dating apps are an untapped market when it comes to friendships. I've made so many friends through matching with them on a dating app and realising that we're not romantically compatible but still got along and wanted to remain in each other's lives.  

Now before your partner yells at me, I'm not telling you to download dating apps to find a friend. The good news is that there are some dating apps like Bumble BFF that have a friend feature in them so you can swipe away. 

Another place that's underrated is Facebook groups. 

There's a Facebook group for everything now. You can find a group that's in your area that either shares a common interest with you, does constant meetups for trivia or sporting events or maybe you're just looking for people around the same age who want to hang out. Just search exactly what you're looking for on Facebook and I guarantee there will be a group for you. 

The Sydney Girls meet-ups Facebook group is a great place to start. 

You can DM people in the group to hang out or meet everyone at a scheduled group hangout. 

Hobbies/activities.

If you've read an article similar to this before, you would've seen a sentence along the lines of, "Join your local gym." And if you're anyone like me, you would've rolled your eyes and turned off the computer. 

Yes, it's true, I know heaps of people who've made friends through some sort of physical activity, but working out isn't the only way you can make friends this way. 

There are other activities you can take part in such as book clubs, dog park meetups and even doing something that betters someone else's life such as volunteering. Keep an eye out for Facebook events, flyers in your mail and even some subreddit threads and discord groups like /Sydney.

Neighbours.

Although my apartment building is full of short-term renters and AirBnbs, I've made it a point to get to know all of my neighbours. At first, it was for safety to make sure my neighbours knew who I was and could watch out for me and vice versa. 

Now, I have made three close friends in my building. A couple in their 60s upstairs and a dad in his 40s opposite me. Who said your friends have to be a similar age to you? Every now and then, we catch up in the hallway where I unload my very serious life problems as a 27-year-old woman. 

I got to know my neighbours in December last year, by knocking on their doors to wish them a Merry Christmas. I let them know a little bit about me and told them which apartment I lived in and they were so appreciative they now constantly check in.  

Listen to the author of this article talk about the two types of friends. Post continues below.

Friends of friends.

This one might be obvious but it needs to be noted down. Mutual friends can be the best friends. If you love your friend, surely you'd love your friend's friends right? So how do you meet your friend's friends? 

By saying yes to everything. 

Finding friends can be daunting and intimidating. Your knee-jerk reaction to going to an event where you know no one is probably a big no. But what would happen if you said yes? Maybe no one will talk to you and you'll feel sad and go home. However, this isn't high school — we're all adults here. What if you went and you made a really good friend who you plan to go to the movies with the next day? 

The hardest part about making friends is that you have to put yourself out there. We can't just rely on situational friendships like our work colleagues because what happens if working from home takes off again or the friendship doesn't last out of the office? 

Investing and showing complete mutual interest in your friendships can help grow and nurture them AND it helps you become a more confident person — win-win!   

If you want more culture opinions from Emily Vernem, you can follow her on Instagram @emilyvernem.

Feature image: Canva.